UUCC Sermons Archive

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This We Believe - UUCC October 28, 2007
Sermon by UUCC Minister Rev. Lori Staubitz 

Knock, Knock
Who’s there?
U who?
U who who?….
It’s me neighbor, just stopping by to share something I am really excited about; You know that new church I joined, well…   Years ago, one of my preaching / homiletics courses at Virginia Union Theological School in Richmond, Virginia was taught by a well known elder, African American Baptist preacher Rev. Miles Jones. He used some very down to earth analogies, stories and images to bring home his teaching points.  

I remember him telling us that it was our job as preachers to design our sermons in such a way as to get people from the street onto the porch. Once there, we were to help them through the door. It wasn’t enough to just let them in, we needed to help move them in such a way that they would make themselves at home with the message, find comfort in the saving power of gospels. It was our job to help the lost find refuge, to give worshipers something worthy and nourishing to the spirit, so they in turn, could venture out to share the good news of their faith with others. 

He cautioned that if we didn’t provide enough substance, catchy phrases and well crafted stories would not suffice…If we failed to “bring them home“, we would lose people out the back door just as soon as we had opened the front door to invite them in. I think he knew too, how our own spiritual development would suffer….if we, as ministers, neglected to explore the deeper theological foundations of our faith. This image helps me as a minister but I think it is a good image for each and every one of us; new aspirants as well as growing and maturing members of this liberal tradition alike. Most UU’s are familiar with the Principals. We hand them out to newcomers and pull them out of our wallets to use as talking points when we have a chance to share some of our values with others. 

In 1987 we adopted these 7 principals. They were an effort to hone and clarify values and practices we held in common; it gave us a means of articulating a common faith. We’ve done this many times throughout our history. As an ordained Unitarian Universalist minister, I have considered our principals more as methods for practice than a faith statement.  I have heard it said many times that we are not a creedal people. However, in every age, we need to assess the essence of our faith, as Theodore Parker did in his time…Here in our time we need to be asking that same question: “What is transient and what is permanent?”…. We have a saving message we would do well to articulate to a wanting and waiting world.  

I have always found the 7 principals useful but not sustaining….they are helpful reminders pointing the way to deeper truths but do not offer much solace in times of personal despair or in the face of present day atrocities, famine, genocide, terrorism and ecological disaster.  I have never given them as words of comfort for the grieving, they fall short in addressing real life difficulties and say nothing of love. However, our seven principals do provide an entrée to the liberal journey, a doorway to the interior life of a devoted, radical faith tradition. 

If Rev. Jones were here today, he might point out that these principals are a good way to get people up on the front porch, a helpful introduction…but he would admonish us to go further …to answer the door with our message; to invite all into a deeper understanding, to help one another take up residency in this living and abiding faith. In order to do this, he would say, we will first need to ground ourselves in some ancient (the Old Testament was his only choice) scripture or some important religious story that will illuminate our purpose. Unitarian Universalist theology is evidenced in ancient poetry and mysticism, Egyptian Kingships, Hindu and Buddhist teachings, Jewish Scripture, the Christian Gospels, Native teachings, Indigenous, earth centered religions, in scientific discoveries and through the arts. We are unique in the ways we value a wide spectrum of sources to lend authority to our saving message. 

So let us turn our thoughts and ears to Isaiah 61- found in our hymnal under Universal Ministry # 571. We are recipients of a Heretical faith tradition…..stories of those willing to question and challenge the powers and principalities of their day: The prophets of Israel called for justice in light of the atrocities of their time. Jesus, the model universalist was affirming, compassionate and stood with the oppressed. 

1)    1517- Martin Luther (Germany) of the Protestant Reformation spoke about our direct relationship to the divine and the  empowering responsibility of the individual. 

2)    1531-Michael Servatus (Spain) “He taunted the Protestant reformer Calvin by publishing the “Errors of the Trinity” in which he promoted the concept of a Unitarian God, or one God instead of the trinity.  Servatus is considered a UU martyr since he was burned at the stake with his books. 

3)    1554- Casteilio (France) - supported religious toleration for all which was known as universalism.  He was condemned to death as a heretic. 

The first evidence of a U. U. community was in Transylvania after 1550.  For a very short, but significant time, Universalism was upheld by King John Sigismund. He was influenced most greatly by his mother the Queen and a trained priest and statesman Francis David, both Unitarians.    

In 1587 the first Act of Religious Toleration and Freedom of Conscience was established and upheld.  Unitarian Christianity continues today. Many congregations in the United States have established partnerships with churches in that region. 

·        Human Goodness and Free will over the doctrine of original sin,

·        The unity of God over the doctrine of the Trinity,

·        Use of reason while interpreting the scriptures 

These hallmarks of liberalism over time would become the more conservative, Orthodoxy of New England Traditionalists. Three centuries later four historical figures rocked this form of liberal Christianity:  

Rev. William Ellery Channing for his famous “Baltimore Sermon” given at the ordination of Jared Sparks in 1819 entitled “Unitarian Christianity.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson, transcendentalist writer who delivered a radical address to the graduating class June 15,1838, at Harvard Divinity School.  

Rev. Theodore Parker, abolitionist Unitarian minister, delivered a sermon entitled “The Transient and Permanent in Christianity” at the ordination of Rev. Charles Shackford on May 19, 1841 in Boston.

In his introduction to “Three Prophets of Religious Liberalism” author Conrad Wright provides insight into how these three leaders laid the foundations for contemporary Liberal Theology. 

He wrote: “All three of these addresses represent turning points in the history of American Unitarianism. Emerson cut deeply at the traditional philosophy of Unitarianism so that it was never possible for Unitarians to return to the position that Christianity is based on the single authority of Christ as the unique channel for God’s revelation to humanity. Emerson and Parker alike insisted that the religious impulse is primary and universal and that Christianity is one of many expressions of that primary (divine) impulse, deriving authority from congruity of universal truth.” 

There are many liberal prophets from this period. Struggles with sexism, racism and classism are evident in the ways our history has been handed down to us and are clearly ongoing challenges for us today. It is important to add the Universalist, itinerant country preacher Hosea Ballou to our list of American Prophets this morning, for his message of Universal Salvation is foundational to our gospel of hope.   

His treatise on Atonement written in 1805 introduces an image of God as loving father, one who will be reconciled to all his children, over the angry, judging and vengeful god known by many, even to this day. As our first hymn proclaims: religious truth is unfolding, not confined to any one particular event, time, place or tradition. 

Who will proclaim our prophetic, saving message today?  

Erich Fromm “Finding the Good” -
-quote from John Montgomery’s book “The Great Pretender: An Examination of God Through Science, Psychology and Philosophy” 

Fromm describes “the good” as biophilia; the passionate love of life, of all that is, a desire to foster and nurture growth, whether in a person, plants / ecosystems, ideas of social groups. Those who share this passion look for ways to construct rather than retain, be more rather than have more. She or he is capable of wondering and finds confirmation in the process of creation than comfort in maintaining what is. This is a person who loves the adventure of living more than certainty, looks for continuity and wholeness over the more concrete summation of parts. This is a person who strives to influence through love, reason and example rather than by force, cutting things down or apart…who acknowledges relations over treating others as a means to an end.  

What can we say about ourselves here and now, that will be more than a watered down, mediocre consensus….something that will propel us to move closer to the center of our faith with a firm knowledge and commitment….

Let us tell our story, that we are people with a dynamic, evolving, emergent faith. It is not fixed. It is not static… 

We are a people who believe in ongoing revelation, truth, beauty and wisdom unfolding through all times, and places; from all peoples. The spirit of life welling up, in and through each living being. In spite of all our failings, we continue to trust in our potential to do good, to be compassionate, to love and do justice. 

In 1819 William Ellery Channing wrote:
“I am a member of a great family of souls” 

Perhaps, the essence of our faith is simply this….. 

We Believe:
In the beauty and power of each life and the unity of all life. … here is our home. This is where we belong; each one of us, every living being. Let us help one another feel welcome. 

A prophetic vision for “Welcome Home” is put into words by contemporary Ceramic Artist and Feminist Judy Chicago. It comes from her larger work “Dinner Party”: And is found in our Hymnal #465 Entitled “And Then” 

And then all that has divided us will merge.
And then compassion will be wedded to power
And then softness will come to a world that is harsh and unkind 

And then both men and women will be gentle
And then both women and men will be strong 

And then no person will be subject to another’s will
And then all will be rich and free and varied 

And then the greed of some will give way to the needs of many
And then all will share equally in the Earth’s abundance

And then al will care for e the sick and the weak and the old
And then all will nourish the young 

And then all will cherish life’s creatures
And then all will live in harmony with each other and the Earth
And then everywhere will be called Eden once again.

-Amen

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High Fidelity - Love and Commitment UUCC Feb. 17, 2008
Sermon by UUCC Minister Rev. Lori Staubitz

It takes a bit of the “hopeless romantic” in all of us to do this work of ministry…that is to say, to hang in there, to keep on, keep'n on, even when the going gets tough and the road gets weary…. Maybe that’s why on Friday nights, after a long week, there are two things I love to do…dance around the kitchen listening to Italian tenors and watch a romantic comedy. I know, some of you may be shaking your heads and secretly adding me to the list of “helpless romantics”….I confess, I have seen Gone with the Wind and African Queen more than once…. Perhaps it is the undying spirit of hope that is so inspirational; that in spite of it all, love wins out…or at least that is the way these movies are SUPPOSED to end.  So you might not be surprised to know that this sermon title comes from March 2000 Movie High Fidelity

John Cusak- Rob, is a record store owner and a compulsive list maker, he recounts his top five breakups, including the one in progress. It is a comedy about fear of commitment, hating your job, falling in and out of love… Rob is faced with the fact that he is the "king of breaking up" and if he doesn't rectify this dilemma soon he will end up alone.

-excerpt from review of High Fidelity
by Dean Kish

After his most recent breakup, Rob begins to reassess his romantic life. He starts to re-categorize his album collection. (Not alphabetically or chronologically, but autobiographically! This way he can tell who he bought the record for, where he was at that stage in his life, and which specific heartbreak each song references. It would be sad if it weren't so funny.) Rob even has his breakups listed, in top-5 fashion, most painful at the top.

Unfortunately, this is the case for most everyone of us…  Whether it is the loss of love, friendship, jobs, or for many of us, loss of community…our hearts are broken, again and again and again.  “Along with language, romance may be one of the hardest skills we’ll ever acquire.” ¹

 But we are born lovers.

“Even before we know how to turn on the charm, touch and chemistry are bonding us firmly to our caregivers-and bonding them to us.” “Within the first months of life, babies already know how to flirt-a survival mechanism to encourage caretakers to love and protect them. Getting that protection teaches the quid pro quo, that love requires both give and take.” ²

We don’t know our character Ro, but we do know from the onset that he is forever moving from one relationship to the next without moving to the deeper level of commitment with any relationship. This of course is typical of young adulthood, but our guy Rob no longer qualifies as an adolescent…although his level of understanding relationships suggests otherwise.

“In an effort to cleanse himself of his 'romantic loser' status, he goes about contacting his earlier lovers to see exactly what it was that doomed these relationships” – excerpt from movie review by Scott Weinberg

His experiences are not unlike our own when we are first attracted to someone or something… We too have had many relationships, no matter how brief where we fall head over heals into :

• Attraction or the Liking stage; a feeling of closeness, understanding, support and affection but no commitment or passion. Mark of many friendships, neighborly relations or involvement in organizations.

Or we jump off the deep end into:

• Infatuation: Lots of instant passion that can end as quickly as it begins…with no intimacy or commitment.

¹ The Science of Romance; Tiffany Sharples, Time Jan 8, 2008
² Ibid.

Or deeper yet…we delve into a relationship marked by

• Romance: marked by both passion and intimacy but commitment is uncertain.

Romantics are driven by a sense of hope and vision. However, we run into trouble, when we become too quickly disillusioned by a relationship when it starts to fall short of our imagination. A Mature Love is grounded in much more than immediate self satisfaction.

• Consummate love:  Love relationships with high commitment, intimacy and passion.

•  Compassionate Love: Intimacy and commitment are high... can be witnessed in long term
        dedication to a relationship or cause.

However, commitment alone can lead to lifeless, Empty Love if it is based only on a sense of duty or commitment without passion or intimacy.

Mature love requires passion, intimacy and commitment if it is to endure suffering and loss
Loss if innocence: Loss of illusion: 

The breaking point in the movie doesn’t come until the very end. You begin to believe that this guy is doomed to never move beyond the introductory stages of relationship to anyone or anything. He hates his job, he hates his life, he is unsatisfied with everyone who has disappointed him in love. Until, he has an epiphany. After interviewing his top five, he starts to realize a pattern.  

A Mature love humbles us out of our own illusions of perfection. It is a love that demands that we open our eyes to our own imperfections.

It is a love that knows vulnerability and risk as well compassion, understanding and forgiveness. Some of his last lines go something like this…. You see, I didn’t understand that I would have to repeat the same pattern over and over again. I found out that no matter who I am with, I will have to move beyond the point where I am disappointed to really know what love is.  

Unitarian Minister James Luther Adams wrote these words on such a love as this,  “Universal Love, or Love of God, then is the giving of oneself to the power that holds the world together, and that, when we are tearing it apart, persuades us to come to ourselves and start on new beginnings; “” “Through this love which is a self-giving to a process of transformation; all persons, in their relation to each other and in their diversity, become mutually supporting and enhancing rather than mutually impoverishing. Here the antagonism between egoism and altruism is transcended in the devotion to the good of others, which is at the same time the fulfillment of the good of the self.  In this relationship, one loses (the finite sense of self to find and live out a greater sense of relationship and identity)  “This kind of love however, promises no rosy path “

(It demands much from us, it demands an integrity of spirit, ability to withstand loss of innocence, grief and yes, even suffering for a higher good, it requires humility to learn and grow and forgive and begin anew, with genuine concern for others.)-paraphrase

We are people who have loved and lost.

We are lovers who have given our best and at times it has not been good enough.

We have counted on others. We have trusted, only to be disillusioned and disappointed…

But that is not all…..

We are learning that love has a cost.

As Unitarian Universalist we are called to a High Fidelity.

We are no “easy date” …for like Rob, many come to discover that the commitment to learning, self awareness and change along with a commitment to love and justice are necessary tenants of this progressive faith tradition.

Prohibitions on love stain the course of our human history. We know that it was not long ago that interfaith and interracial marriages were banned. We stood on the side of love when it was obvious that love knows no limits and will defy the boundaries of race, religion, class and culture. 

Once again, we are being asked to stand with the oppressed; to act for those whom intimacy, passion and commitment are denied in the presence of the law.

Hundreds of Marylanders descended on Annapolis to Rally and Lobby for LGBT Civil Rights on one of the coldest nights this winter.

Equality Maryland, the state's lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) civil rights organization, held its annual rally and Lobby Day in Annapolis on Monday, Feb. 11th.

For the first time in Maryland, same-sex marriage advocates have the opportunity to work for a bill—the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act--that guarantees all Marylanders the right to civil marriage, instead of fighting a bill that restricts that fundamental right.  Specifically, the bill defines a marriage between two people (as opposed to a man and a woman) as valid, and it affirms that no religion or clergy would be required to perform any marriage in violation of the freedom of religion.

At this time we are being asked to stand on the side of love once again, only this time, we will need to stand with those who love and share a single gender.

What kind of love will be required of us? 

There is a love that can transcend all our personal bias and limitations and call us forward into deeper relationship with all others.

·    Universal Love: Love, Commitment and Passion that extend beyond the constructs of self, family, nation, class, race, gender or even species…the highest form of love.

It has it foundations in the individual heart, mind, body and spirit but can be best manifest in and through a loving community. 

Closing Reading: Bible

1 Corinthians 13 
1 If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a
   clanging cymbal.
2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can
    move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,^[b] but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails..

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
 

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The Possibility and Limits of Forgiveness by Rev. Lori Staubitz
Coming from Irish / Italian ancestry, I laughed when someone told me the joke about “Irish Alzheimer’s- forgetting everything but your grudges. Of course, Italian Vendettas are the stuff of which movies are made. Unfortunately, jokes can bear an element of truth. Why even the epic feud between the Hatfield’s and McCoy’s has a foundation in fact……but the real heart of the matter is …We all struggle to forgive.

     Ernest Hemingway once wrote a story about a Spanish father who decides to reconcile with his son. The son had run away to Madrid.  After a long while, the father, remorseful of how he had treated his son’s mistakes, posted an ad in the newspaper reading "Paco meet me at Hotel Montana Noon Tuesday. All Is Forgiven Papa."  Paco is a common name in Spain, and when the father goes to the square he finds eight hundred young men named Paco waiting for their fathers.

     Our collective need to forgive and be forgiven goes well beyond personal, family and neighborhood relationships. We relate to others as a congregation, a community, a state and as a nation. We have much to forgive and much to be forgiven.

“Don't forgive too soon” by Donald Shriver speaking at Worcester, Mass. just after 11 September; reprinted in "The Forgiveness We Need" p4

     “As we begin to speak about forgiveness, I caution myself about speaking about it too soon, before we have appreciated evil’s crushing burden in the lives and deaths of those who have suffered its most immediate impacts. I am a fortunate Manhattanite who did not work last Tuesday in the World Trade Center.   I was not the father who phoned from a top floor to say goodbye to his wife and two small children.  I am not the orphaned child of two parents massacred in Rwanda.”

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     “ Nor did my own government in Pol Pot’s Cambodia widow me.  Nor did my son disappear in a prison in pre-1990 Johannesburg.  I have no right, therefore, to expect such victims of humanly enacted evil to turn soon to the possibility of forgiving those who have thus trespassed against them.  As one who believes that the God and Father of Jesus means to heal this world of its sins, I must not lose touch with that belief.

     As for translating it into the realm of our fractured human affairs, I must beware of calling anyone to forgive until I have struggled to appreciate the depth of their suffering, the depth of the evils which they suffer and which I have not yet had to suffer.”

Forgiveness and justice” by Desmond Tutu 

 -interview by BeliefNet after 9/11

     Forgiveness is not to condone or minimize the awfulness of an atrocity or wrong.  It is to recognize its ghastliness but to choose to acknowledge the essential humanity of the perpetrator and to give that perpetrator the possibility of making a new beginning.  It is an act of much hope and not despair.  It is to hope in the essential goodness of people and to have faith in their potential to change.  It is to bet on that possibility.  Forgiveness is not opposed to justice, especially if it is not punitive justice but restorative justice, justice that does not seek primarily to punish the perpetrator, to hit out, but looks to heal a breach, to restore a social equilibrium that the atrocity or misdeed has disturbed. “

To carry a grudge is like being stung to death by one bee.

-William H. Walton

Forgiveness is so essential to human relationships and health that religious traditions have developed a means for the faithful to give and receive forgiveness, even when it is denied by others.

“If we practice Forgiveness we enter into a process of cease and desist. We come to terms with feelings of resentment, indignation or anger for harm done to us by others- intentionally/ or not. We enter a state of forgiveness when we cease to demand punishment or restitution.[1]

We come into the state of forgiveness when we can love again in spite of past transgressions.”-reference: Wikipedia

“In Buddhism, forgiveness is seen as a private practice to prevent harmful thoughts from causing havoc on one’s mental well-being.[3] Buddhism recognizes that feelings of hatred and ill-will leave a lasting effect on our mind karma. When resentments have already arisen, the Buddhist view is to calmly proceed to release them. Buddhism questions the reality of the passions that make forgiveness necessary as well as the reality of the objects of those passions.[5] "If we haven’t forgiven, we keep creating an identity around our pain, and that is what is reborn. “reference: Wikipedia

In much the same way, our relational covenant invites us to relate in ways that are equally as generous; and when our generosity fails us, our Covenant provides us with guidance through a process to act in ways that are life giving rather than destructive to persons or to our community.

 “Studies show that people who forgive are happier and healthier than those who hold resentments.[24] One study has shown that the positive benefit of forgiveness is similar whether it was based upon religious or secular counseling “-Wikipedia

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“However, the act of forgiveness goes hand in hand with the act of atonement, for it may be necessary for the offender to offer some form of acknowledgment, apology, and/or restitution, in order for the wronged person to forgive.[1]

Atonement: Meaning: 1. Making up for past misdeeds, transgressions; making amends for an injury or offense. 2. Reconciliation,

Yom Kippur, the final day of the Jewish High Holidays (literally, the Days of Awe), the ten days beginning with Rosh Hashanah (Sept 30th) and ending with Yom Kippur(Sundown, this Thursday  Oct. 9th)  In Hebrew Yom Kippur means "Day of Atonement" and is the holiest day of the Jewish year. “Atonement is an early 16th century creation from at+one under the influence of Latin  word "unity".

Jewish law requires the practice atonement; seeking out those you  have wronged to make amends.

The ancient Israelites performed a ritual to atone for their sins and provide a means of reconciling their relationship with god.

 Two goats were chosen, one to be sacrificed and the other serve as the (e)scapegoat or Azazel. The high priest laid his hands upon the sacrificial goat who then “carried the weight of sin” and outcaste the animal into the desert. That is why today scapegoat refers to someone who is blamed for the sins of others. “-Wikipedia

This concept of Divine forgiveness developed in Christianity from its Jewish roots. It is Jesus as messiah and redeemer who reconciles the believer with divine forgiveness.

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Rituals for divine forgiveness are found in many religious traditions. For, indeed there are acts that are so aggrieves they fall far beyond our human capacity to forgive.

There are times when seeking intervention is the only way a victim or perpetrator can find a way to peace.

How do we forgive the unforgivable?

 “While imprisoned in a Nazi concentration camp, Simon Wiesenthal was taken one day from his work detail to the bedside of a dying member of the S.S. Haunted by the crimes he had witnessed and participated in, the soldier wanted to confess and obtain forgiveness from –a Jew. Wiesenthal was to hear the confession. Faced with the choice between compassion and justice, silence and truth, Wiesenthal said nothing, but remained haunted for years by the Nazi Officer’s request. The weight of that encounter compelled him to address the conflicting issues of forgiveness.

In his book, “The Sunflower: On the Possibilities and Limits of Forgiveness” he asks “did I do the right thing?” and invites responses from  a wide range of political leaders, theologians, psychiatrists and Human rights activists as well as other survivors of genocide.

Although the responses vary greatly, each one seems to address the essential dilemma of forgiving the unforgivable.  I want to share three points that I believe can inform us and provide a means for individual and congregational healing.

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First: Forgiveness of others is foundational to our own healing process. If we seek to overcome the effects of the physical, emotional and spiritual wounds inflicted upon us by others, we need to have a way out of internalized anger and rage.  Our willingness to engage in a healthy process of reconciliation is essential to our own growth and survival.

Second: How important acts of atonement and reconciliation are to the healing process.

Third: The role that religion has in our ability to forgive. Ritual acts of forgiveness can be a first step toward transformative change and increase our capacity to deal constructively with feelings of guilt, shame, anger, hate, rage and revenge. The concept of reconciliation, bringing the many together into a whole is foundational to our Universalist theology and mission.

We participate in Atonement when we join in transformational work and service.

It is our understanding as UU’s that we do bear the burdens of the past. Not because we, individually caused harm, but because have benefited from collective mid-deeds and we are the ones who  CAN begin the  process to facilitate healing.

On a more global scale, we participate in acts of atonement when we engage in Anti-racism, Anti-oppression, Equal Opportunity, Fair Trade, Green Environmental practices, Sustainable living and support peace initiatives. 

We open the door to reconciliation when we refuse to alter congregational history by suppressing truth or overlooking institutionalized injustice.

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Our vision and mission is an important part of the long, slow process to fulfill the promise of our faith tradition by bringing wholeness to our human family and to live in harmony with all life on our planet.

But what of our own deep, personal pain? How do we reconcile those events and people in our lives that seem unforgiveable?

“Forgiveness and spiritual identity

Choosing to begin the process of forgiveness brings us to the threshold of wisdom itself.  Our spiritual identity is no longer dependent on what others think of us, want from us, or have manipulated us into becoming.   Instead, we experience our lives as we are and as we find ourselves.- Rabbi Yehudah Fine   from an online seminar

Through empathy for a person who's hurt me, I can understand that person's feelings, but I may still hate what he or she did to me.  I think that in order to really have a forgiving sense, you need to go beyond empathy.  You need to recognise in a humble way that you, too, have hurt people, and you've been forgiven for some of those hurts.  If you think about it for awhile, you can draw on many cases where you've received forgiveness when you didn't deserve it. For religious people, it's often forgiveness from God.  As people reflect on those times, they usually feel very grateful.  They say, "I deserved condemnation for this nasty thing I did, but I got forgiveness, and I'm grateful - and I really would like to give that gift of freedom to the person who hurt me."

Everett L Worthington   in "Spirituality and Health"  Winter 1999

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Psychologists and other counselors who advocate forgiveness as a virtue (present) forgiveness as something that primarily serves the forgiver, something that will eventually be necessary for her or his mental health.

This psychological view of forgiveness has its limitations.  There is, indeed, a beauty in the idea that forgiveness is something an individual does for herself, to ennoble the spirit, and to reach a certain level of peace.  But … as noted earlier, forgiving in this way requires no change from the perpetrator; it requires no apology; and it requires no response from the broader community.

Sharon Lamb  Dept of Psychology, St Michael’s College, Vermont

http://www.uic.edu/~lnucci/MoralEd/aotm/forgiven.htm

Forgiveness without apology and acts of reconciliation are at the heart of what Theologian Paul Tillich would call “Cheap forgiveness”-the act of forgiving or being forgiven that does not result in any significant change.

Cheap forgiveness happens when destructive behaviors are ignored, hidden and not addressed….when we sweep transgressions “under the rug” and behave as though they never happened. “Forgiveness as forgetting is a form of denial that can result in ongoing rage.

For indeed atonement; the act of acknowledging wrong-doing and taking steps to alter the course of the future can swing opens the doors of bondage and propel us forward into

-a place where hearts and minds are transformed to a new way of being in relation. Where “never again” is a promise that is upheld through the forging of strengthened human bonds of renewed trust, love and commitment.

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Act of Forgiveness- Atonement: Invitation for those who wish to participate:

Whatever pain you carry, whatever need you have to forgive or be forgiven, I invite you to come forward to feel the weight of your burden this in the form of a stone.

When you are ready-place you stone in our joys and sorrows bowl, in the hope that this water, a symbol of life and renewal will be an outward sign of your inward journey to begin the process of healing and forgiveness.

If you are not able to let go at this time, please carry your stone with you for as long as you have need. This bowl will be here each week as we join in Worship.

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Reading:

Adapted by Rev. Lori Staubitz from Rev. Howard Thurman’s “Meditations of the Heart”

“Restoreth My Soul” pg. 214.

“The ravages of time are at work in me. I remember when to do the wrong thing brought sharp, swift judgment to my mind and spirit.  Then there followed a period when much in me that was sensitive to error grew dull and numb.

Until at last there were dead places and barren spots.

Perhaps it was a passing remark from a thoughtful friend or a forgotten moment of prayer or compassion to which my mind alone responded but of which my feelings were un-aware- but I knew at that moment how far I had drifted.”

“The drain on my spirit from so much hardship has taken its toll. All my energy seems to be spent on merely keeping in step. The excuse of weariness and exhaustion seems ever at hand.  Why should I care so much, while few others seem bothered? It is all I can do to handle the necessities of my own life and that I do poorly….then, somewhere along the way, all seemed wrong.

Before (life itself), I took time to confess every weary detail. When I finished I was spent. While I waited in my exhaustion, Strength and renewal were at work in me. Deep within me there was born the declaration that this risk I must not ever run again.  I know now that the soul is restored moment by moment, if the doors to the heart and mind are not held tightly shut or jammed by too many cares left untended.”

 

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The Mystical Path to Unity; Sermon by Rev. Lori Staubitz

Reading: Humanist Manifesto 1:

Religion: A Question of Relationship by Rev. Lori Staubitz

Beyond the Seven Principles: The Core of Our Faith
Rev. David Bumbaugh-Professor Meadville Lombard-Chicago-teaching ministry to our future ministers.

He begins by quoting Earl Morse Wilbur, author or a (lengthy) history of Unitarianism,(-required reading for all professional ministers.

“ at one time or another our ancestors have embraced almost every theological position imaginable. When left to their own devices, he argued, they abandoned confessional statements and embraced a practice of “freedom, reason, and tolerance.”

David continues with these words

“Mulling over this historic insight, I found myself remembering the myth of Parsival and the quest for the Holy Grail. You may recall that in some versions of the old legend, (at an opportune moment, he is standing in the grail castle, with the vision of the grail floating before his eyes, Parsival failed in his quest for the grail because he was unable to ask the right question. The question was not, “What is the Grail?” or “What do I believe about the Grail?” or “What understanding of the grail do we hold in common?” or “How can I grasp the meaning of the grail so I can explain it to others?” The right question was “Whom does the Grail serve?” Solving a riddle,often depends upon asking the right question.

 Perhaps the core of our faith cannot be captured by a confessional statement which seeks to answer the question, what beliefs do Unitarian Universalists hold in common? Perhaps the core of our faith is not theological but rather experiential. Perhaps the foundation of our (Unitarian Universalist) faith can best be grasped by asking the question, “Whom do we serve?”- adapted from original question /quote “Whom do Unitarian Universalists serve?” 

-Selected from an adapted sermon delivered before the Ballou Channing and the Mountain Desert chapters of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers Association and published under the title "Our Anthropology, Our Story, and New Covenants of Collaboration Among Us" in 2006 in the UUMA's Unitarian Universalism Selected Essays 2004.

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